Hello, you!

Sorry no updates over the last couple of weeks. To get you all caught up, I did the road-trip to Bolton on Easter Saturday. It was a long day - out of the house at 8am, home about 1am - but an absolutely brilliant experience.

In the main tournament I made it through the first two breaks but went absolutely card-dead for about two hours. I’m just not a good enough player to keep my stack ticking over if I don’t have the cards, plus I think I was a little intimidated by the game and the setting. I ended up pushing in from second position for about twice the big blind with K10 suited, but the button’s pocket 9s stood up to put me out about 90th in a field of 148.

I then played in a £20 sit-and-go and managed to piss away my early chip lead by playing an awful lot of legitimately terrible poker. Recognising I was a tired and tilty, I elected to spend the rest of the evening as a railbird.

Still, I had a great time despite being really disappointed with my play. I ended up travelling with a bunch of regulars from the Tuesday night game who wouldn’t otherwise have been able to make it, and they proved to be a thoroughly excellent group to spend several hours cooped up in a very small car with.

Plus, I’m now a member of a casino. Which really makes me feel very James Bond indeed.

Then this weekend, I got my hair cut for the first time in about 5 years. On the upside, I now look roughly 20% less like the Comic Book Guy. On the downside, my famous Cousin It impression is now a thing of the past.

By way of illustration, I’ve pretty much gone from Bill Bailey to Action Man.

After spending most of Saturday whimpering in a foetal position, I’ve now progressed to the stage where I’m only 40% traumatised and 60% convinced it was probably for the best.

AND THEN today, on getting back from my lunchbreak I was faced with this:

Damp leads to subsidence. Subsidence leads to crumbling. Crumbling leads to scaffolding.

I didn’t have the nerve to ask the burly hard-hatted men in the vicinity if it was meant to be scaffolding for Jedi, or scaffolding by Jedi.

Either way guys, two words - Force Levitate.